Hello to you all! Today I would like to share a few things I have on my mind. Here they come 🙂
This is usually one of those topics you find a lot of different answers on when searching the internet. You guessed it, or not. Christian dating. Speaking of, my first question about it was: are we supposed to jump straight from brother/sister to fiance then spouse? There are so much teachings, preaching and what not on marriage and/or engagement, but not so much on dating. Or courtship. See, I don’t even know what to call « it », you know, the phase when you are busy assessing each other’s character for suitability. Suitability for marriage it is, because christians are at least not supposed to be in the business of test driving people for sexual chemistry, but the flesh is weak… However, Matthew 26:41 tells you what you are to do so that you will not give in.
Back to my,err, concerns. So the NO SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE is a given, I don’t think we should even spend time on that one. But aside from that, there’s not much we, or let’s say I know about the do’s and dont’s of dating while christian. Oh and the « pray about it to know if it’s God’s will »… okayyy. Of course, but can we get practical advice? I have seen somewhere when they tell you to always go out in groups. But… how do I get to know the PERSON if we are always around people? I am in no way saying go lock yourself in a room with beau/bella, because this is recipe for fornication, but how exactly do you expect someone to marry a person they never saw angry? I mean, how do one knows they will not smash their head against a wall or yell at them like they’re somebody’s master or something? What I’m trying to say is, if we are going to get to know each other, let us know the ins and outs. And the ins might never come out if it is always full house around us. Now, about the kissing thing. To kiss or not to kiss? And do not tell me « seek God’s face » or I will scream! And what happens when we encounter problems? Is the counselling thing only for engaged and married couples? It’s confusing ha!lol.
I feel like one of the problems with the dating thing is that it does not exist in the Bible. Man met woman, liked/loved her, then married her. Check the story of Isaac and Rebecca (Genesis 24) or Jacob’s (Genesis 29:17-21), among others. Whereas, instructions for a godly marriage are all found in the Word, therefore pastors, elders and other leaders are equipped to teach, counsel and preach on those things. It is almost like singles are (a little) forgotten in church in the relationship department. I mean, I know singles are to focus on the business of the Lord, but when the desire to marry is in one’s heart, do they expect people to get engaged right after « hello, how are you? » :p. And since more and more youth give their life to Christ, these are the kind of questions that will need answers, because it is the 21st century and we do not wish to marry strangers like they did in ancient times. I’m sure you understand. Nobody wants to find themselves in Jacob’s situation lol! (Genesis 29:23-25).
Feel free to answer, comment, etc.